 |
 |
The Animal (2001)
|
Genre: |
Comedy |
Director: |
Luke Greenfield
|
Rating: |
PG-13 |
Running Time: |
83 Minutes |
Release Date: |
June 1, 2001 |
Official Website: |
|
Movie Trailer: |
|
Discuss and vote: |
|
|
Cast: |
Rob Schneider
Colleen Haskell
John C. McGinley
Edward Asner
Michael Caton
Louis Lombardi
Guy Torry
Bob Rubin
Pilar Schneider
|
|
Pickup Line: Survival Of The Hairiest!
Quickie: A police wannabe who never gets any respect finally gets some (yeah, that, too!) when a near-fatal accident puts him under the care of a mad scientist who saves him by putting animal parts in him and turning him into a he-beast.
The Long Review:
The previews for "The Animal" give you major clues that watching the movie isn't exactly brain exercise. They weren't lying. This movie is all simple, kinky humour, hair and fur, with no deep, hidden meaning or anything. It's a classic case of what you see is what you get. Plain and simple.
"The Animal" tells the tale of Marvin Mange, who, true to his name, repulses people with his clumsiness and loserish ways. He has great aspirations to be a cop but alas, his lack of athletic ability and overactive bladder prevent him from achieving his precious dream. One day, while playing cop, he gets into a spectacular accident and is put back together by a mad scientist who puts animal parts in him. But Marvin is not your ordinary Humpty-Dumpty. The guy has the grace of a cat, the agility of a monkey, the speed of a cheetah, the rage of a bull...get the point? The world has a new hero, ladies and gentlemen! Step aside, He-Man! He-Beast is in town and he's on the prowl!
"The Animal" has a very simple plot laden with quirky moments and tacky jokes that you can't help but laugh at. It's 87 minutes of not-so-innocent, dirty fun. And it has Colleen Haskell, the sweetheart of "Survivor 1," who plays Rob Schneider's love interest. Here's a warning to all men lusting after this castaway: Ms. Haskell has gained back the weight she lost while roughing it on that island...and probably a few pounds more. She still looks good, though. Just think of it this way: There's more Colleen to love! Tee-hee! And can she act? No, not really. But c'mon. It's "The Animal." How much acting can there possibly be? Again, tee-hee!
We have to admit, Rob Schneider does have a certain appeal. No matter what role he plays, be it a man-whore or a hairy beast, you like him and sympathize with him. You can say he has some sort of animal magnetism. Hahaha! Hmmm...is it the luscious curls on his head? His soulful eyes? Or perhaps his amazing physique? Well, whatever it is, it works, because people actually go to his movies and enjoy a few laughs. We did. But keep in mind that we saw this movie during a cheap night. And we thought it was okay. Had we paid full price to watch this shallow comedy, we might have felt a bit ripped off. So if you're a big Rob Schneider fan who just can't get enough of his long shhh...shhh...shiny, curly hair (What were you thinking, you dirty animal?!), then by all means, rush to see it and pay the full fee. But if you're the type of person who prefers cutting wit over gross humour any day, then it's probably best you wait till this movie comes out on video...or DVD...whatever.
In Two Minutes:
Did you know?
- "The Animal" was produced by Adam Sandler, who also makes a cameo in the film. Need we explain more?
- This is Colleen Haskell's second attempt at acting. America's sweetheart (next to Julia Roberts, of course), has starred in her very own Chapstick commercial. And she claims she didn't get a single stick. Of Chapstick, we mean. Somebody give her a Chapstick before she makes any more movies! Harty-har-har!
|
Thumbs Up 
Thumbs Down